Three days passed and I was still lost in the thoughts of what the old lady, Aruna, had told me.
When I look back at my life… before I was sent to my grandma’s house to continue school, I dreamed of becoming a doctor. That was all I ever wanted. But after being thrown into that hell, everything changed. Somehow, after completing my secondary school, I set my heart on becoming a lawyer…….. I wanted to be someone who fights for girls like me and for people whose rights are taken away. I worked hard, tutored students to earn a little money and tried my best to secure a seat in college… but all my dreams were crushed.
Now, with so many responsibilities on my shoulders, I don’t even know what I should do. Yes, Aruna madam’s words did ignite a spark in me………reminding me how unfair it would be if I lived my whole life serving everyone but never once looking at my own future. But what am I supposed to do now?
I want a better future for myself but that won’t come from working endlessly at the hotel. I need a better job, one that doesn’t demand twelve to fifteen hours a day, including Sundays, just to make ends meet. Those jobs come only with better education… or by starting a business of my own.
My own business? Is that even possible in my current situation?
I still have another year before Akash finishes his studies. I have to support my parents too, and I know I won’t have time to study. Money is another wall…………I simply can’t afford to pursue education right now.
I was too overwhelmed to decide anything. My eyes drifted to the visiting card I held in my hand as I lay on the mattress. Just then, my phone pinged with a notification. The author had updated a new chapter of the story I was reading.
Needing a break from my nonstop, spiraling thoughts, I decided to read the update.
It was a chapter where the male lead spoke to the heroine at a turning point in her life—a moment of fear, hesitation and uncertainty. His words were calm, but powerful.
“Life isn’t about walking the easiest path. It’s about choosing the right one…….especially when it’s hard. A single choice, made at the right time, can change everything. And a woman with education… she carries her strength within her. No one can take that away.” he told her in the story and I paused reading, the meaning sinking slowly, deeply into me.
As I continued reading, I felt as the man beside me, his arms wrapped around me in a safe embrace. His presence felt warm, steady, encouraging. Like every other time, he understood my struggles, my fears, my dreams and I could almost hear him whispering in my ear.
“You are stronger than you think, the world may shake but your mind, your knowledge will hold you steady. Don’t ever doubt the power you carry.” he said.
I blinked, my chest tightened with emotions. For a moment, I wasn’t just reading a story, I was living inside it. The character felt real, as if he was reaching out from the pages, telling me that my choices mattered… telling me that my efforts, my learning, my resilience were not small…they were everything.
I exhaled softly and a faint smile touched my lips. His words carried a power that settled deep inside me, making me realize that maybe… it was finally time to think about myself. Opportunities had never waited for me, and responsibilities had never taken a break—not even for a day. I had been struggling under their weight for far too long.
Maybe I should call that number.
Maybe they could help me financially with my studies.
Maybe I could stop working on Sundays and use that time for classes.
But then another fear rose up.
What should I even study? God, why do I always end up with a hundred questions and not a single answer?
Frustrated, I pushed the thoughts aside and forced myself to sleep. I needed whatever energy I could gather for the next day.
The following morning, I reached the restaurant and slipped back into my usual routine, but my mind refused to stay calm. The confusion kept circling me like a storm, I wanted to study, but I didn’t know where to begin.
While serving customers, I noticed many women having breakfast, some laughing softly, some talking over the phone with a serious expression. I wondered what jobs they had, what lives they were leading, and what choices had brought them there.
During my break, I finally gathered courage and spoke to Shanthi sister about my confusion. She was instantly happy for me and encouraged me, telling me that studying was the right step toward my dreams. But soon, even she fell silent, struggling just like me to decide what I should study.
By evening, a group of college students arrived with an older woman. The students called her madam, so I assumed she was their professor. They respected her deeply and anyone could see that. After placing their order, they continued discussing something serious. It looked like the professor was giving them valuable lessons about life, and the students absorbed every word like it mattered.
Watching them, a thought slipped into my mind.
Why not become a teacher?
Why not teach students to be good citizens, to respect people, to build a kinder society?
I served their orders and each one of them thanked me politely. That professor was doing something right. And their parents surely they had given those children a good life and strong values.
Not long after, a woman SI walked in with two constables. The power she carried, the aura she held made the entire restaurant go still for a moment. I froze too.
What if I become a policewoman?
Imagine having the authority to fight injustice, to arrest those who harm others. But standing next to them, I felt so small. Like I was no one with no dreams, no drive, no hunger to fight for a future like they did.
With a tired smile, I forced myself to move to the next table.
After my shift ended, I walked out and got into the share auto. Two nurses were already seated inside, talking softly among themselves. And again, another thought came.
Why not become a nurse?
I mentally scolded myself. I was fantasizing about every job like a little girl daydreaming about her future. Reality was far from that simple.
I reached my stop and got down from the auto. As I walked to the corner of my street, I froze. That man was standing there again at the usual spot.
What was his problem?
Why couldn’t he just let me live in peace?
Frustrated, I quickened my steps and hurried home. I shut the door, unraveled my saree, and threw it aside before changing into my nighty. Then I turned on the stove and placed a pot of water to warm.
Soaking my feet had become a routine now, a small comfort after hours of standing. A moment where the ache eased, even just a little.
I woke up early, determined to meet the NGO and seek their help to find out what support they could offer if I decided to study. I opened my trolley and began searching for my ID cards so I could make copies, just in case they asked for them. That was when my eyes landed on the folder containing my divorce papers.
A soft smile curved my lips on seeing the name Geetha on it.
How had I forgotten her? I hadn’t spoken to her in almost a year and a half. She was always the one who understood me, the one who guided me when life felt too heavy. If anyone could help me with this confusion, it was her. Maybe I should talk to her… or better, meet her directly.
Feeling a sudden sense of direction, I placed my ID cards safely back, got ready quickly and reached the restaurant for my morning shift. After 7, I stepped aside and called Geetha madam.
She sounded genuinely happy to hear my voice after so long and we exchanged greetings. I asked if I could meet her at her office and she readily agreed to see me so I informed the manager that I needed four hours of permission. Thankfully, he agreed, probably because I hadn’t asked for leave or permission ever since I had fallen ill.
At 11, I left the restaurant and booked an auto to reach her office quickly since I didn’t have much time and had to return to work. When I arrived, Geetha madam stood up the moment she saw me and pulled me into a tight hug. I felt my throat tighten with emotion.
“How are you, Meera? It’s been such a long time. How’s life treating you?” she asked gently as she returned to her seat and motioned for me to sit opposite her.
I asked about her well-being and then shared everything what had happened in my life, the weight of my responsibilities, and the confusion that had been eating at me for days. She listened patiently, her expression softening, and then let out a small exhale followed by a smile.
“I have a case in the afternoon session, Come, let’s go out and talk over lunch. You need a peaceful space.” she said, rising to her feet.
I nodded and followed her with a grateful smile. We walked to a nearby restaurant and took a table. After ordering our food, she leaned forward, ready to guide me just like she always had.
Once our food arrived, Geetha madam took a sip of water and looked at me with that thoughtful expression she always had when she was about to guide someone.
“Meera, all the paths you’re thinking about are good. But each one has its own pros and cons. You should understand them clearly before you decide.” she began gently and I nodded, eager to hear her.
“First… a career in law, you already know how much I love this profession. Being a lawyer gives you a voice for your own and for others who don’t have one. You said you once dreamt of fighting for girls like you… that passion matters but the initial years are very tough. Income will be very low or sometimes nothing. You have to learn under a senior, spend long hours in court, handle pressure, and financially you must be prepared to struggle. Later, yes, it becomes rewarding. Very rewarding. But the start is difficult.”
I listened carefully, my chest tightening at the last part.
“Next… becoming an SI. It’s a strong position, no doubt. Power to stop crimes, to protect people. For someone like you who has seen injustice, it can feel meaningful. But Meera… police exams are very competitive. You need good physical fitness, regular training, and the exam syllabus is wide. It requires full focus. And once you join, the job is demanding irregular hours, stress, field work. You must be mentally and physically ready.” she said.
I nodded slowly. I respected the job, but hearing the reality made me nervous.
“Being a teacher is beautiful. You shape young minds. You teach them to be good citizens, just like you admired in that professor. But teaching requires patience, consistency, and proper qualifications. And again initial pay may be low unless you get into a good school. Still, it gives dignity, stability and a peaceful environment.” she explained and I stared at the table, overwhelmed by the weight of choices.
She reached across and touched my hand gently.
“Meera… whichever path you choose, you must understand one thing, all careers start slow. The beginning is always the toughest. You can’t depend on your main job’s income in the first months or even the first year. You should learn a part-time skill,” she said firmly.
“Something that can bring you decent money even while you study or train. Tailoring, baking, basic computer work, content writing, tutoring school children… anything that suits your time and ability. These skills will support you until your main career becomes stable.” she said and her words settled deep inside me.
“Think of your life like a building. Your dream career is the top floor, but part-time skills are the foundation that will keep you steady during the climb.” she explained and I exhaled softly, feeling both relieved and overwhelmed.
Geetha madam smiled warmly. “Don’t worry. You just took the first right step choosing yourself for once and sure you would find a way to reach the top of the building and I would be happy to help you anytime ” she said and I thanked with the whole of my heart.
She had already done far more than I expected, and I didn’t want to trouble her any further. After lunch, I thanked her sincerely and returned to the restaurant.
She has given me a light and soon… I would decide my future.
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