Chapter 25

Rishi was stunned, shocked and froze the moment Vimal revealed that he was Aadhira’s first crush and first love. The mere thought of her heart being crushed by the one person she had loved made his stomach churn and a wave of bile raised to his throat. His guilt hit like a tornado and tears rolled down his cheek.

Vimal: She never believed it would be you but after she knew you will be her husband she was over the moon and her happiness was so evident. She waited everyday to get out of the home and live a life, a real one without being fake. She had lot of dreams of her life with you. My little sister imagined a fairy tale life but I knew the reality, I knew you will hurt her.

Rishi: Please.. please.. please…

Rishi caught his head in his palms unable to bear the pain he felt in his head as well as heart. He couldn’t face the man beside him. All those times he hurt Aadhi with his words and actions flashed his mind which only instensified the pain.

Rishi: I m sorry, I need to go home.

Vimal drove back and as soon they reached, Rishi got into his car and drove off from there. All the way he couldn’t stop the tears that he hurt his love, his little wife. As soon as he reached the penthouse he rushed to the bed room closet and looked for the diary. He found the diary and along with it he found another diary in her trolley. holding both the dairy in his hand he  plopped on the floor, leaning against the wall.

He couldn’t bring himself to open it knowing the pain that was awaiting for him. He shut his eyes for a fleeting moment and opened the diary where it started from the first day of the wedding.

” Rishu, is my husband, I got married to the man who invaded my dreams for the past eight months. My husband didn’t want me as his wife – my love didn’t want me in his life “

Rishi wiped the tears with his sleeves and flipped the pages one by one.

” Rishu thinks I m being fake, he thinks that I m pretending. Not his fault, he doesn’t know that he is the only person who is seeing the real Aadhi”

He flipped to the page and knew it was written on the day when they were in Goa.

” Rishu thought I wanted him to accompany me for shopping  because I only wanted his money but how would I tell him I only wanted to hold his hand “

” Wish I got a chance to lean on to his shoulder while we sat by the shore but how could I do it when he thinks I m a double faced girl ? “

Rishi shut his eyes and gulped hard yet a sob escaped his lips and felt an unbearable pain in his head and throat. He once again wiped his tears and continued reading.

” Rishu denied the gift I bought for him, my first ever bracelet Aadhu ❤ Rishu. May be I will never be his Aadhu “

” I m so happy and lucky to have Rishu in my life but he feels he is not. Does he hate me so much that he feel so unlucky to have me in his life ?” 

Rishi flipped through the pages and every line she had written was a punch on his face. He stopped on the page and the date said it was written on his birthday.

” 24 cakes in 2 weeks and finally the 25th cake that I made for my Rishu was destined to be in the trash.  Wish the it was my blood in the red velvet “

Rishi hit his head back on the wall unable to forgive himself for the pain he has given her.

Rishi:  I m sorry Aadhira, you don’t deserve this. I have been an idiot and let you suffer alone. I m sorry..I m sorry.. I m sorry.. I m sorry…

He couldn’t bear the pain in his body and for few minutes he only shed tears before he continued reading.

” The bracelet I gifted Rishu found its place in my trolley just like my trolley found its place in the closet and me in his room and couch “

He couldn’t blink his eyes on seeing her name written in the middle of the page and crossed over with black sketch. He didn’t need to know the day and closed the dairy without reading further. For the next few minutes he slapped himself for all the pain Aadhi had endured. The other dairy caught his attention and he opened it not before preparing himself.

His lips curved into a smile on seeing her photo on the first page. She was dressed in a cute pjs and sleeping holding her bunny.

Rishi: Cutie pie

He was smiling for the next few minutes on reading her pranks with Vimal and her friends Malini and Chaitra. Finally he stopped on seeing a blank page and later on reading the heading ” Eating puffed rice on a windy day ” he realized it was one of her bucket list. He turned over few pages which were blank similar only with headings.

Rishi: Probably she wanted to fill in once her wish come true. Trust me cutie pie, I will fullfil all your wishes.

He fished out his mobile and made a note of all her wishes. Once he flipped through random pages and saw the details of a man written in it.

” 6 or 6.2 ft, tall and handsome, subtle beard, wearing white shirt, black blazer and black pant. Finally I found someone to crush. Wish I could know his name, my crushy baby”

Rishi blushed knowing it was him she had written about. He flipped through the pages reading and smiling how she had been ranting to know about it. His fingers traced the words and his eyes shed tears on a particular page.

” Its been 7 months since I saw you for the first and last time, crushy baby. You are the first thing on my mind when I wake up and you are the last thing on my mind when I go to sleep. My friends suggested that I should talk to the department student, you gave guest lecture to find about you but I want to try my luck. You are not only my crush, you are my first love and if you are in my destiny then I m sure we shall meet, my love and I will get to know about you. Where are you my love ? What is your name ? “

Rishi: Your love is so pure just like you my dear fire cracker. I will give you all the love and happiness you deserve.

He continued to read and knew how she got to know about him from Vimal and her excitement after the wedding proposal. Finally he stopped on the last page.

” Today I m marrying my Rishu “

He placed both the dairy in her trolley and moved to the balcony. He stood holding the railing and looked at the swing she always sat back when they shared the room. He sat on the swing and leaned his head back on the headrest.

Rishi: I m ashamed of everything I did to you Aadhira and my heart is full of guilt but I don’t want to drown in this and let you suffer anymore. I want to win you back and I will do everything and anything to bring you  back in my life. I cannot erase the past but I will try to rewrite the bitter memories with our love.

Unable to endure the head ache he sauntered to the kitchen and asked for a coffee from Latha. He was in the living sipping the coffee when Aadhi stepped in with a smile which vanished instantly on seeing Rishi in the living. She looked at her watch wondering what he was doing at home.

Rishi: How did it go Aadhira ? Is everything done ?

Aadhi replied him with a nod and sauntered to the kitchen where she saw Latha preparing lunch.  She tied her hair in a bun and started helping her. Rishi avoided looking at her knowing her way of calling him to have food by her gestures rather than calling him. This time he waited for her to call him and pretended to be busy in his mobile. Aadhi placed the casseroles and looked at him to see if he would look but on seeing him busy looking at something in his mobile she dropped the ladle yet Rishi did not look at her. She deliberately made noise on placing the plates and spoon yet there was no response from him.

Rishi controlled himself and prayed for his luck looking at the locked screen of his mobile.

Rishi Mv: Please love, call me, I know you won’t call me Rishu atleast Rishi for the time being. Please please.

Aadhi sat on her usual seat waiting for him and finally gave up.

Aadhi: Rishi..

Rishi snapped his head to her immediately and smiled at her. Instantly he made his way to the dining and sat opposite to her.

Rishi: Aadhira, would you teach me simple recipes ? I really want to learn cooking but my mother never let me in the kitchen.

Aadhi: Its a bad idea and I don’t want to see the wrath of Vani aunty.

Rishi: We live alone and she would not know. Even if she does then I can handle her. Please Aadhira.. I want to cook for you.

Aadhi: You don’t have to do anything for me. Anytime I can cook for myself and please don’t mind asking if you need something too. I can cook.

She served onto her plate and Rishi finished eating quickly and followed her to the bed room. Aadhi stopped in the middle of the stairs and turned to look at Rishi who too stopped behind her.

Aadhi: Do you need something ?

Rishi: No Aadhira, should I remind you that we live in the same room ?

Aadhi hummed and made her way to the bed room. Rishi gave a pat to his chest and followed her.

Rishi: Won’t you ask me about my visit to your parents home ?

There was no reply from her and she stepped into the closet  Rishi leaned on the door and watched her place her file carefully in the trolley.

Rishi: Manjari was really shocked on seeing me. I apologized to her and confessed that I care for her. You were right actually, she loved the earrings and pendant I gifted her. Your mother looked for you too. May be we should meet them for dinner or a weekend lunch.

Aadhi picked her clothes to change and entered the bath room without replying him. Rishi returned to the room to give her space and waited for her. When Aadhi walked out dressed in a lemon yellow salwar, he couldn’t avert his eyes from her. Her long hair cascaded down and she moved a strand behind her ear before she laid on the couch for a nap.

Rishi did not speak further and entered the closet to get changed leaving her to sleep. He too laid on the bed but instead of sleeping he continued to watch her sleep. She looked so calm and cute, sleeping like a baby holding her bunny to her chest.

Rishi: One day I will win my chance in your life and I will replace the bunny.

Two hours later Aadhi woke up with a yawn and stretched her arms yet her eyes were still closed. Rishi blinked at the site and smiled on seeing her antics. Aadhi opened her eyes and Rishi quickly shut his eyes pretending to sleep. Aadhi got down from the couch and stumbled on the teapoy. Rishi immediately opened his eyes and looked at her with worry.

Rishi: Aadhira, are you ok ? What happened ?

Aadhi: Sorry, I disturbed you.

Rishi: What happened to you ?

Aadhi: Nothing, I m fine.

They both heard Shruthi’s voice and reached the living after refreshing. Aadhi made coffee and sat next to Shruthi who was busy on choosing a song in the TV.

Shruthi: You guys are so boring. How could you not even listen to some songs ? I understand about Rishi but Aadhi, what about you ? Don’t you like watching movies, songs ?

Aadhi: Listening to songs only gives head ache.

Rishi spit the coffee and looked at Aadhi in astonishment when he got the taste of his own medicine.